Battle of the sexes

Today is International Women's Day. I am halfway through super long mummy-type post that I was hoping to publish today, but it is just not ready yet. So today I am taking a break from the normal, mindless waffle that I write in order to show I really do have some depth.

When one of my friends found out I have been doing poledancing for fitness on and off for a few years she told me the following quote "We won the battle of the sexes when women began poledancing for exercises". I took this to mean women had won. We took something that was found in seedy strip joints and made it our own (please excuse the stereotypes). It wasn't until I googled the quote so I could say which movie it came from (Crazy, Stupid Love which I still haven't seen by the way) that I realised that in the context of the movie they meant men won the battle. Really? I suppose you could see it like that, but I like my version better. Or perhaps a better outlook would be seeing both sides finding a happy middle ground.

It took me a long time to be comfortable with the word "feminist". It brings to mind bra-burning, man-haters who became lesbians for political reasons. (I know. Sterotypes again. Sorry). As I have gotten older I am so incredibly grateful to these women who came before me. The ones who had to be extreme so I got to make the choices. I don't have to do it all. But I am lucky. I am educated. I choose to balance my work and my family life in a way I am mostly ok with. I deal with the fact there are certain parts of my career that are on hold, because I would rather be home to play chauffeur and tuck my children into bed at night. I have a brain and F-cup boobs. I have two and a half degrees and three gorgeous children. For legal stuff and for work I use my surname. Socially I often used my ex-husband's a long time before we were married and still continue to do for family stuff. I supported my big two girls in their choice to use their surname (their biological father's) alongside their dad's. I shave my legs. I would never contemplate not shaving my arm pits. I happen to quite like men, but I don't need to have a partner. My daughters do dancing and play sport with the boys.

I want other women to be able to make these life choices. Whatever choices are right for them. Whether that is to smash the glass ceiling or to spend every single day of their adult lives at home looking after their families. This is why I am ok now with being labelled a feminist. Although personally I quite like the term post-feminist feminism. I have spent so much time studying history so I know how far we have come. Maybe this is why sometimes I forget how far we still have to go. But thanks to the women who have come before me, and thanks to the men who have supported them, I can do this on my own terms.

And while we are on the topic of history and women. Embrace the colour purple ladies. When I was at school they used to say it purple meant you are sexually frustrated. It was the colour of the suffragettes. You know if they had been at home properly wedded and bedded they would have had better things to do then think (please don't miss the sarcasm).

So wear purple proudly. Celebrate with your girlfriends. Dance, drink champagne, scrapbook or build a shed. Thank your mothers and your grandmothers. Thank the now conservative teachers you had who would have been out there burning bras when they were at uni. Thank the wonderful men in your life who don't get why feminism is needed because they really do treat women equally (re-educate them later). Remember how far we have come and don't ever think it is far enough. All people need to be equal and those of us who are lucky enough to be in the position where we do not feel discriminated against, can't ever forget we are the lucky ones. And I still maintain we won with the poledancing.

(Please tune back in tomorrow when normal programming will recommence. Not that I am convinced I have a normal blog style yet, but it might start tomorrow)

V Day

All the posts have made me laugh today. It has just been one of those times that I am reminded I am a historian. Every time I read 'V day' my first thought is 'VE day' and worse, every time I read 'VD' my first thought is venereal disease. Now I sound like I am totally insane, you need to read my next paragraph (or two if you want the extended version).

Short version: I did my Honours thesis on the repeal of the Contagious Diseases Acts in England in the late nineteenth century. A lot of the readings used VD as an abbreviation for venereal disease.

Extended version: Why was that my Honours topic? I wanted my History thesis to sound sort of legalish (because my other major was Legal Studies). I  also wanted a particular supervisor who specialised in women's history in Europe. With the benefit of hindsight I should have scratched the legal component! Although I finished (despite Aimee arriving in the middle) and the BA (Hons) does look pretty after my name on the odd occasion I get to use it so I won't regret not thinking of an awesome topic too much.

In other news, I had a truly lovely birthday. The girls made me breakfast in bed. Work got cake for morning tea. One of my friends came around for dinner. And my boss is taking our team out to lunch tomorrow! I have also got non-stop messages all day. Having your birthday on Valentine's Day when you are in a relationship may not have major benefits, but when you are single you are still bombarded with love :)

Hope you have all had a lovely day and have reflected on all the important relationships in life. 'Love' just doesn't mean romance :)